31 Oct

So even though a lot of my beliefs are about working with people, in some ways I can be pretty bad at actually doing so. I tend towards independent work. Lately, working with a student group I have seen the ways that my independence gets in the way of group process (like I don’t always double check decisions with the group) and that has been frustrating. Definitely something I have been working on though. A new member of the group and I are teaching a workshop together and so we are also making a zine about it together, and we did that tonight and it felt really good to actually be working with someone. I think it turned out well. But particularly writing collaboratively is tricky. I felt really nervous about it. I am secure when it comes to representing myself, but insecure once that involves others.

Also, because I try to be non-hegemonic and non-hierarchical I am hyper-aware of the potential for being  overbearing. I can’t tell when I am being too dominant, or if that is ok with the other person, or what I should be doing along those lines. Some people I work with are really shy, and I’m really not, and I want to make them comfortable, and I don’t want to be making all the decisions. It is really difficult for me to work with shy people sometimes.

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