How to be a Vampire Slayer- from Cuddle Puddles and Hot Pants # 2

1 Feb

How to be a vampire slayer (part of the apocalypse preparation series)

(Sometimes I think about my life in terms of being a vampire slayer. It is more fun that way. And it is another motivator for me to get out there and do things which improve my life and health.)

Step 1- Go running (you have to be fast to get away from the cops/monsters)

Step 2- Lift weights (have to be strong enough to fight off supernatural beings)

Step 3- Work on speed and agility (or spagility, if you will)

Step 4- Carve wooden stakes (what better things do you have to do?)

Step 5- Utility Belt (to store all of your sweet vamp huntin gear)

Step 5- Learn to Shoot a gun/ get a gun (for the zombie apocalypse)

Step 6- Learn to throw knives/get throwing knives (it is hot)

Step 7- Learn some forensics (to figure crimes out and to get away with them too)

Step 8- Learn how to track and how to be stealth (sneeeaaky)

Step 9- Learn some sweet acrobatic moves (back flips)

Step 10- Look flippin cool (good outfit)

Step 11- Hang out in graveyards ( I do this anyway)

Step 12- Rock climbing, kayaking, swimming under water long distances (I mean, why not, it will be fun)

Step 13- Continue to learn Emergency Medical Skills (for fixing vamp bites and other wounds)

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One Response to “How to be a Vampire Slayer- from Cuddle Puddles and Hot Pants # 2”

  1. The Red Son March 6, 2008 at 3:42 am #

    Looks good. The best anti-supernatural monster ammo that I have heard involves soaking lead slugs in a mixture of holy water, garlic powder and silver nitrate and then loading them into bullets. If you want to go one step further they you can seal this mixture inside the tips of hollow points. This round will be effective against Vampires, Lychenthrope (were-creatures) and Zombies (just because they are bullets). Also this seems this a great training regiment.

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